Good Year For Hunters



They come to me when they want their accounts settled.  When they're feeling out of sorts and need a little bit of advice.  When they're in need of some hope.

 

To be a successful businessman, you have got to learn how to sell hope.

 

So I give it to them in little doses.  Just this morning, one of the little girls from the women's division - Miss Molly, they call her - came up to me and said she wanted to overcome the 'stigma of having a large ass'.  A nutritionist would tell her to get on a treadmill.  A psychiatrist would tell her to get over it.

 

But I whispered in her ear that she should wear a thong. 

 

What would you have done for her?  Patted her head and sent her on the way?  Not me.  I teach my disciples proactivity, because this is the way of the world, my friend. 

 

Dollars for peace-of-mind.  Who's the real sufferer?  I can sell you a little happiness if you'll sell me a little of your soul.  If it makes you happy, what's the harm?  You could say I'm living to make lives better - and by making their lives better, I'm making my life better.

 

Isn't that beautiful?

 

Oh, I can't say I don't suffer for what I love.  Living off of whispers - the charge of twisting but not touching - manipulating, uninvolved.  Do you think it's easy to be noticed only through hints - through the most subliminal of suggestions?  Maybe I get off on the game - letting others do my dirty work.

 

The one who dies with the cleanest hands wins.  It's the American way of life. 

 

"Excuse me, are you Sean O'Haire?"

 

Yes.

 

"I've got this problem - I heard that you help people with problems.  I - I can't stand Trish.  I want something to happen to her, but I don’t have the courage to fix things.  Could you..."

 

Everything is within your power.  All you have to do is seek it.

 

So come a little closer...


The End